At the top of the stairs we have a long mirror. It’s a full length mirror. If you stand back you can see the whole of your reflection. The mirror has had several homes, been past around the family. It’s not old, not an antique. Not a family air loom. The frame is non distinctive.... Continue Reading →


I have a video of one of the boys. We were on a train, trundling down to London. Watching the world whizz by in a blur. Occasionally focusing on something, a shopping centre, a flock of sheep, a river flowing under a bridge. Those moments were crystal clear images, a snapshot, a clarity, that was... Continue Reading →


The boy is ALWAYS losing his keys. He must have lost at least ten this year. In fact it may be more. He loses them when he's out. Sometimes when he's in. Where the keys go, he never knows. Sometimes he is cross at himself, for being so careless. Sometimes it is someone else's fault,... Continue Reading →

Invisible String

Some very special friends of ours have a relative who lives in Australia, thousands of miles away. Recently they have been talking about a piece of invisible string that connects them all. Across the miles. Across their lives. Always connecting them. No matter what. Tom had moved away from home to a new friend called... Continue Reading →

Number 46

Again, names have been changed. The night after Tom had gone missing ( read the story here - 129600 ) I came down with a bad cold. The boys had had it, so it was inevitable I would have it. I had driven to work, but had to turn around, as I felt ill. I hate being... Continue Reading →


Things had not been good for a good couple of weeks. New friendships were being made, best friends ever. Talk of moving in with the new friends. Then, spectacular fallouts. Stories of threats and fights. Then nothing. Then a new friend. Tom went to stay with the new friend. I wish I could name this... Continue Reading →


Floating like broken satellites, sending signals to no where. Asking, begging for help. Grasping onto the broken “happy ever afters” Shattered hopes and aspirations. All the broken promises. Of the never returned calls. Watching the broken bag of marbles. Falling and scattering across the floor. Dreaming the eternal broken dream. Of how things could have... Continue Reading →


I have often wondered what it must be like for my two, who have experienced trauma, to have flashbacks. Where they relive a memory, an experience. You know those bracelets, that snap around your wrist when you touch them? That’s what it’s like. Sometimes you can be fiddling with it for ages, nothing. Then touch... Continue Reading →

Scattered Showers

In this new world I am living I watch TV on an evening. I usually don't sit down until late, the boxes seem to be getting smaller, but we are still finding things. Oh, and one of the TV remotes STILL hasn't turned up. It will be somewhere safe ...I  know it... Anyway, I digress.... Continue Reading →


The other day I was told several times, in a kind of dismissive way, sometimes patronising way, that the way the “nearly the adults” are behaving – is normal. That I shouldn’t be complaining. That every other parent of “ nearly an adult “ was living the same, on a day-to-day basis. Can I be... Continue Reading →

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